Thursday, September 21, 2006

Ummm... yeah

So, it has been quite a while, hasn't it? Time for a quick update before I start rattling on about whatever. I got a job (Wheeee!) working at St. Joe's Hospital in Bellingham. I'll actually be working for three different departments doing data entry, filing, letter writing/editing, research, and whatever else they need done. I'm excited about working there, and I have orientation starting Monday. Ummm... what else? Oh, I'm recovering really well from my surgery. I have full range of motion without it feeling like I'm going to pull some stitches out and my scars are turning pink which apparently is a very good sign. It's a little frustrating to still be pretty substantial, even after my size literally got cut in half. I'm sure I'll get over it and everything: don't get me wrong, I really like the fact that they are so much smaller and more manageable, and well... normal looking. But still... I had hoped to get something that was proportional to my body size instead of something more proportional to my body size. I should probably be at least a size (or two) smaller to go with the rest of my body, but this is significantly better then what I was before.

Time for a new subject. I've been feeling kind of weird these past few days, and I'm not sure what it is exactly. I've been talking a lot to my friend Ryan (which is nothing really new) but it's different... a little less serious and a lot more playful. It's fun to have friendships and relationships that are fun and slightly silly. I feel like I'm standing on a precipice looking down, and if I'm not careful I could teeter off into the abyss. Okay, maybe it's more like a 5 foot ledge with huge cushions at the bottom, but whatever, you get my point. Sort of going along with the feeling sort of odd - my family is CRAZY. Like certified insane. I just don't get it. I'm crazy and smart, and crazy - but right now I feel like the only normal, sane person in my household. Part of me is quietly saying "pack your bags, you can be out by the end of next month" while the practical part of me is saying "stay until you have enough money saved for a car, then pack your bags and move out." I need to live with someone who is cleaner then my family. Who picks up after themselves and doesn't eat disgusting things. hmmm.... Maybe I'll just live with my cat and feed her lunch meats all day.


quote of the day: Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. - Marianne Williamson